Father-son bonding #1 — “Now that exams are done, …”

Hey J my precious son, First and foremost, CONGRATULATIONS! After six long years of primary school education, you're finally done with that Holy Grail of a gruelling national examination (the PSLE or Primary School Leaving Examinations). That which forever decides which secondary school you'll go to next year. Of course it's only the first of … Continue reading Father-son bonding #1 — “Now that exams are done, …”

How home-based learning is like “realpolitik”!

Former US President Theodore Roosevelt said the best foreign policy was "speak softly and carry a big stick." Talk about a succinct way to define realpolitik and gunboat diplomacy! I often find that to be true too when it comes to home based learning (HBL) with my son C; at least when it comes to … Continue reading How home-based learning is like “realpolitik”!

‘Worth in the Hearth’ — A New Masculine Identity?

On Father’s Day 2021, my musings on the losses and gains of being a stay home dad {A version of this post first appeared here in a local news publication Todayonline. Also, check out a reader's beautifully written and resonating response to my piece here.}When it comes to parenting, one truth remains today: Fathers are, … Continue reading ‘Worth in the Hearth’ — A New Masculine Identity?

Email circa 2031: My dear sons, beware “The Toxic 12” – #12 The PR Snobs

Hey boys This is it! We made it. The last email, in this long-running series that began more than six months ago, is finally here. So on the count of three, let's heave a collective sigh of relief shall we? One... Two... Three!!! Sighhhhhh.... Alright, now that we got that outta the way, let's recap … Continue reading Email circa 2031: My dear sons, beware “The Toxic 12” – #12 The PR Snobs

“Model breadwinning fathers” make stay home dads look like losers

I know I’m supposed to offer grace, but I can’t. Not now, not yet.  Not when I’m still living through my Waterloo; my daily dose of stay home parenting blues.What am I talking about you ask? I’m talking about “model breadwinning fathers" Photo by Clark Young on Unsplash There are many such "model breadwinning fathers", … Continue reading “Model breadwinning fathers” make stay home dads look like losers

“Three Wrongs Do Not An Essay Make” – How one memory derailed my writing plan

An editor approached me a couple of months back, asking if I would share with her readers my journey as a dad with a special needs child; in particular the period following my son's official ASD (Autism Spectrum Disorder) diagnosis. My first thought was: "Ok, sure. That diagnosis happened more than two years ago so … Continue reading “Three Wrongs Do Not An Essay Make” – How one memory derailed my writing plan

How soaked bibs, leaked diapers and supervised showers are my daily lessons in acceptance

There are three things you'll typically hear in my household on any given day or night:    "Caleb! Is it (his chin) dry? C'mon Caleb, swallow your saliva, please. Look, your bib's all wet!!"    Night: "Caleb! Come and shh-shh (pee) now before bedtime. Then wear your diaper    properly before you get into bed. … Continue reading How soaked bibs, leaked diapers and supervised showers are my daily lessons in acceptance

How a car accident exposed my ‘inner engine’

BANG!That moment just before impact seemed to almost slow to a crawl, like a slow-motion replay, as I watched in utter jaw-dropping disbelief.The way a spectator at an F1 race would watch as a race car suddenly goes off course and flips.I knew what was about to happen, but I was powerless to stop it … Continue reading How a car accident exposed my ‘inner engine’

This Father’s Day, I wish my father…

...hadn't: been trapped in his patriarchal past and so lorded it over us. equated a person's worth ONLY with money and power. given endless lectures because he knew not how else to connect with his family. waxed lyrical about his hometown incessantly, like it was heaven on earth praised his own goodness non-stop, saying he's … Continue reading This Father’s Day, I wish my father…

Please Lord, may I have 50 more Father’s Day?!

So what to say about this coming Sunday, my 11th anniversary of celebrating Father's Day as a dad? After all, it's an unfinished journey, so maybe I should wait a few more years to say something meaningful? Or when the kids have all grown up and flown the coop? Yet, as I turn 50 in … Continue reading Please Lord, may I have 50 more Father’s Day?!