Resting From Book Writing (For Now)

By now, this should be familiar territory for me. Having had my writing rejected before by other publishers, the latest rejection (five days ago) of my book manuscript no longer has the sting the previous ones did.

In fact, it was actually liberating and affirming in ways I didn’t expect.

And to top it off, the rejection was done in such a kind, gentle and thoughtful way, I thought I was (like a newborn by his doting parents) being carefully and meticulously “clothed” — for a future of writing — with garments of hope !

Let me explain.

My Writing And Rejection Are Old Friends

Writing has always been one roller-coaster of a ride for me.

I’ve always dabbled in journaling and diary entries for much of my life. Admittedly though, they have been both irregular and irrelevant to anyone but me. Throughout my school years as well as the period I spent living abroad, writing down my thoughts has been a way to exercise some creative agency for myself. It was also a helpful way to figure out stuff happening in my life. From academics to marriage and having kids.

But since being more intentional in making writing an indispensable part of my life six years ago, I’ve not looked back. Instead, I’ve continued to churn out a regular (and I hope healthy) dose of life experiences and knowledge. To be shared more broadly through various public platforms (paid or not). Including of course this blog where I churn out an essay and a poem every week.

The challenge of course is to know if what I write interests anyone. These days, I’ve enough proof my writing interests various folks. Especially if (like me) they are into the cornerstone content that anchors the pieces found in my blog. Pieces covering autism, parenting, writing and life in general.

But I’ve also received more than my fair share of rejections when submitting manuscripts and essays to various publications. They either “ignore” my submissions (mostly because they only reply to shortlisted ones) or reply with a terse “thanks but no thanks.” Similar to the regular mill regular folks experience applying for regular jobs, being interviewed, then being turned down.

So writing and rejection feels like conjoined twins in my life. Or old friends if you will.

My Writing Still Needs Work

In September last year, I had met with a well-known local publisher to share my draft manuscript. The meeting went well and the publisher was extremely kind and patient. He listened carefully to my story. He asked appropriate questions at the appropriate times, and showed genuine interest in my book idea.

A stark contrast to publishers I met two years ago. Those were all business-like and came across more transactional than relational in their demeanour. Yes, I acknowledge that book publishing is a business. However, I reject the notion it should be treated as a business, because it’s about so much more than that! It’s about creativity and life. Being and becoming. It’s the very marrow of our humanity (to me anyway).

Following from that meeting in September, I submitted my manuscript. Then, I waited patiently as they took time to peruse it with a fine tooth comb.

Three weeks ago they emailed to express their “appreciation for the vulnerability and honesty” in my manuscript. And to arrange an in-person chat with me to share their reflections and hear more about my writing process.

I knew right away it was a goner! But at least they were letting me down, without letting me “down”.

Clearly my writing still needs work.

A Dream Meeting For Any Writer Being Told “No”

The meeting took place five days ago.

I have to say that on reflection, if ever I had past similar meetings where I’m being rejected, told “no”, or let go of in ways that were gentle and kind, I don’t remember them.

But I will remember this one. Both the publisher and his editor sat me down and spent the next hour and a half talking with me about the good and not-so-great about my manuscript.

They pointed out to me that my book was still not ready for publication but there were clearly many gems of stories sprinkled throughout the roughly 50,000 word piece in different places. They urged me to let the book “rest” indefinitely til I’m clearer what I want to say. Then to sit down and re-read the whole piece from start to end with “fresh eyes.”

These were all good advice, and advice that I’m actually familiar with too, having studied and researched about good writing practices from published authors and writing coaches.

But what made it a “dream meeting” for me, was how they “handled” me throughout. There was a lot of empathy, support and understanding as the editor shared her observations, and offered kind suggestions what I could do. While I might not have agreed with all her points — there will always be creative differences when it comes to art — I deeply appreciated the careful manner she adopted to let me down easy.

As hard as it was to once more have my manuscript be rejected, I could at least walk away from that meeting feeling good, because they took pains to make me feel good.

And to know that when I feel ready again, I can come back to them, for their door will always be opened to me.