Do You Recognise Me, Mom?
Hey Mom! It’s me again.
I’m sorry I don’t come more often
It’s true that you live far away
Yet is a 45-minute drive really far?
But you’re far not just in distance Mom
When I see you it’s like you’re looking to me
Or through me? With me? Against me?
But not looking at me. Into me.
Seeing me.
Yet not.
It’s cruel this disease
Taking you away from me
From everyone who knew you
Who remembers you. Thinks of you.
Still. Me? Honestly?
I don’t know how to feel
We were never very dear
To one another I fear
You did your part
Being my mom
While I was growing up
With you. Yet very much not
You didn’t understand my struggles
Didn’t come through when I stumbled
Only sewing shirt holes
And cleaning sh*t woes
Yet what was I to expect from you?
How selfish and self-centred am I to think
You can be my answer to everything
The way you might want me now to be?
But it might now be too late
This disease that likes to wait
Slowly draining the last of memories from you
Taking you steadily away from me
Mom, do you still recognise me?
{In observance of World Alzheimer’s Day}
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