I Want You To Leave
I want you to leave
Dare
I to think it?
There
Before you
To say it
One day?
I want you to leave!
I was trying to reach you my way
By not reaching you your way
I wanted long conversations
Lots of green tea and being present
You wanted none of it
Only to stay and continue your coloring in a daze
And to have nothing to do with me
But here you are daily
In my physical and mental spaces
Reminding me you’re still in this
Land of the living
Though I’d rather have no trace
Of you
That’s right.
Not a single trace
For
You’re a daily reminder of
A childhood I didn’t ask for
One I wish I had amnesia of
A past I would never long for
Had I a choice
They say you can’t pick your family
But could not for me an exception be made?
Then I needn’t have carried these emotional cares
All these decades, the lion’s share
Of hurts and reprisals
Quarrels and refusals
Seeing you each day now
Brings forth more reminders and sorrows
So, please
Can’t you
Just
Leave??!!
