Self-doubt
You read what I wrote
Yet you only saw
What was for you a sick experiment recall
Of a devilish bloke
Out to weigh his pals down.
Had you been someone else
I’ll not mind so much
But we’ve been friends 20 years now
Yet you saw not my pain
Just what you thought I was trying selfishly to gain
You even threw the Holy Book at me!
Lecturing me on the ways of friends
Ask yourself is it really true?
That I’m out to get at everyone?
That I’m out to get you?
All I can say is thanks for plunging me into self-doubt
Thanks for dialing back the needle to when we first went out
I realize now my experiment was actually spot on.
I’ve filtered out the likes of you
Who in reality never understood.
My struggles since young with friends and identity
With belonging to someone, anyone.
I thought you knew.
I guess I was wrong so wrong.
They say true friends can just pick up where you left off.
Even after many moons have come and gone.
But they forget that this applies only to casual friends.
So now I know.
That’s all to you I am.
My bad…for leaning hard on friends.
Must learn now to let go and let God.
So I need never again wallow in
Self-doubt.
Wow, I thought this is a powerful piece. You know it’s powerful when it causes one’s guts to stir and then return to a place of healing. Reflected on my own friendships and also my relationship with God.
Thanks Jo for popping by. Wasn’t too sure at first if I should send out this poem but anyway, I do appreciate your comments and your support. Great too that it gave you pause for a cause. All the best in your own friendship and God journey pal!